A rant

Oh! How valuable are the prayers of the saints. I have been greatly encouraged by the consistent love shown to me by my friends… but more than that my real brothers and sisters in the Lord. I want you all to know that your prayers are timely and effective! Today I got a text from one of your stating that you were praying for me at 12:35 p.m.; at a very point in time when I was feeling insufficient and frustrated. I had a frustrating experience of getting stuck in the beautiful snow, was being attacked with feeling of insufficiency and felt unworthy to be blessed as I am. To a certain degree I am not worthy, but I would never be if all I did were to compare myself to others or to unrealistic expectations. As a result of your prayers and the moving of the Holy Spirit, I am confident that God will continue to perfect me into exactly what He wants me to be and will continue to comfort me with his presence. You may not have known why you prayed for me, but God does.

The question that I have been receiving more lately than in the preceding few months is “So you still want to come back to Phoenix?” My gut response used to be yes… and in my flesh the answer is yes. But as I was on the phone with a friend last night I confessed “It seems when I hold on to a thing really tightly then I risk getting them taken away. However, when I hold things loosely, not selfishly it seems God give me the option to take or leave something. And He knows that I will make the right choice when that happens. Or at least be more inclined to the right decision ☺.

I have a big meeting this afternoon, and my intent was to post this last night, so that I could solicit prayer. I didn’t get it posted… but you can still pray The meeting is with the leaders of the program that should give me a little more insight as to what I can expect my future to hold as a pastor.

For the first time people who don’t even know me have called me pastor! Granted we were at church but it was a humbling reminder of the weight of the responsibility of the calling to serve the Lord.

What I must remember - when I’m tempted to compare myself to others – is a truth that I heard in the past, “They aren’t like you… so you can’t expect to look to them for love, affirmation or acceptance. God will be your sufficiency, your exceeding great reward.”

Some of this might sound like ranting and seem a little incoherent; but the simple way to understand how I feel today is - unique. I have had a very different experience than everyone I know, although some parts are shared, God allows that so I can connect with people and minister to them.

Sanctified, set apart yes.... that's me... by God's grace