Stronger Everyday

Wow!
So much has happened in the recent past that I haven’t written about. I apologize but I guess I have been living life more than just writing about it. Hahaha. But I guess that’s the point of blogging.

A couple of weeks ago I had the pleasure of seeing my sister in the Lord, Tracy, connect with a great young man of God, Chad Steel as they started their new life as one in Christ. Praise God! It gave me such joy to see the patient endurance of my sister be honored by our awesome Lord. Our faithful God answered her prayers, and I believe He made sure that she was prepared for this blessed union; in spite of the many years of preparation that it took.


Also, at the wedding, I had a chance to catch up with some good friends ... all in one spot. Like Kim and Jose in this picture!
During that same weekend, I ran in the PF Chang’s Rock N Roll Marathon and ½ Marathon. While I was home for the Christmas holiday, my friend Bernadette decided that she was going to run the ½ Marathon for the third time. Being the competitor I am I decided that I should do so as well…. Or at least consider it. Therefore, I resolved upon my return to Chicago, “If I can jump on the treadmill and run 13 miles, then I’ll sign up for the race.” I successfully completed my goal, but I was still reluctant to go through with registering. After an encouraging follow up from my friend, I decided to be a man of my word and followed through with registering. Needless to say in spite of my lack of training, God gave me much grace and allowed me to complete the race in less than hours! I was ecstatic! I beat my goal of 2 hours and at the end of the race I felt victorious, strong, thankful, praise-filled. It was great to know in my heart that I had it within me to run even more if needed as I crossed the finish line. Unlike my high school days when I crossed the finish line of cross country races with remorse about not giving it 100%, I had confidence that I had run the race intended for me to run…. Wait.. That’ll preach! Anyhow, my first ½ marathon was a wonderful experience.

The following weekend on Saturday, I took a road trip to Iowa to speak at a banquet honoring the lay leaders of the student ministries that night. I will not go into as much detail about this experience, but suffice it to say that I didn’t have that same sense of victory as I took my seat after delivering a charge to these fellow saints. I was in a sea of weariness, frustration and discouragement. My first experience of being in -4 degree temperatures seemed to even permeate my ministry experience. It felt cold. I didn’t stick around for Sunday morning service at that church, ready to put this disheartening encounter behind me.

The Sunday morning drive back to Elgin was frigid, but I felt that the presence of the Lord was with me the entire way! I had the Lord being the pilot, and I rode with Him
I had a wonderful experience the following day.

After returning to Elgin, I went swiftly to New Covenant Fellowship where one of my colleagues in the School of Ministry, Dan, brought a good word about trials by drawing upon his life experiences, as well as rooting the text in James 1. It was a strong word that served as strength through the tough time that I had the previous day, as well as strength for future trails. Overall I was thoroughly excited for my friend, and thankful for the Word speaking to my life.

Before Dan and I had a chance to leave the church, a spirit led group of pastors and leaders in the church prayed for me and gave me a word of prophesy over my life.
Here’s how I felt when I was being prayed over … here is an excerpt from an email response to the Sr. Pastor of the church, the primary man who let the time of prayer over me.

As a follow up to my time at New Covenant, I want to thank you so much for the leadership that you show your people and the way that you shepard them. It is apparent in their love for visitors and one another that the Spirit of the Lord is truly present… and active in their midst. The Holy Spirit was tangible in my visit and I felt enveloped in love and peace. As you and the saints prayed over me, I was truly engulfed in the presence of God. I literally felt as if God was kneeling down beside me with His arm draped over me and encouraged my spirit. Thank you thank you thank you for your prayers. They were fervent and effectual. I received from the Lord greatly.
It was a time when the Lord was filling me, blessing me, confirming His presence and guidance in my life.

Later that afternoon, I sent off a friend on her first mission trip, as she set out for a three-month stint in India. Pyary was one of the people who has helped me feel loved and accepted in the Chicagoland area, and within the Harvest family. It was back in September on my birthday when she shared her vision to be a missionary overseas with our group of friends. Therefore, I sense a strong link of “love for ministry” between Pyary and me. Her perspective on life, friends and faith is lovingly conveyed through her compassionate responses to everyone around her. Pyary is an effective listener who is quick to try to relate to others. This is one of the many reasons that I think God has prepared her for this missionary ministry work in India. For example, it wasn’t until I began my friendship with Pyary that I learned about the southern part of India having Christians, while the northern part of the country being unsaved. I grew up around many Indians from the northern part, who were predominantly Hindu. As this small group of people came around Pyary to commission her to the Lord’s work, we enjoyed good food, meaningful conversations, communion and sweet prayer. Again, I could sense the tangible presence of the Lord in that place. As a result, it was confirmed in my heart that I was connected, loved, and useful for the kingdom work here in Chicago


Throughout that week I was still encouraged in my heart and felt light. That week coincidentally was also the week of prayer for harvest bible chapel. Specifically, Thursday night we had a time of prayer at the church. I found myself in the midst of a the congregation lifting up prayers. One of the many fallacies that struck me during this time was the tendency to be over structured in our churches. Specifically, the night of prayer was organized with an agenda such that there were four stations between which the people in attendance were to rotate, praying for specific things at each. As I left station one proceeding to station 2 I looked to my left and saw a guy sitting there with tears coming off the nose of his bowed down head. I thought, “This is absurd. We have four stations to pray for these long lists of requests, but no opportunity has been given for us to pray for one another.” I put down the list and walk over to him and say, “Can I pray for you? What’s going on?” And I proceeded to pray for my new friend and just minister to him at his point of need. It was God’s gentle way of reminding me to organize, and yet remain sensitive to the Spirit.

I feel as if I have been closer to the Lord than I have for a while. His faithfulness is covering me, giving me peace and guiding even the small decisions in my life – whether to take one route to the store or another. Although that practice could be equally entangling, in regards to being fearful about doing anything, I have learned to slow down a bit. Literally… like in regards to my driving. That, in and of itself, is near miraculous. But really, any fruit of the Holy Spirit – in this instance, self-control is not because of my great capacity to do such but because of His leading.

Last weekend was also great! The Connect Ministry of Harvest Bible Chapel, geared toward 20’s and 30 somethings took Friday, Saturday and Sunday to retreat to our camp just outside of Grand Rapids, Michigan. Several different facets of the retreat combined to help me be reminded about truths that the Lord has been speaking into my life.

The first shock was the considerable amount of snow. Since Michigan is on the opposite side of Lake Michigan from Chicago, it gets a substantially greater amount of the beautiful winter weather in light, fluffy powder form. As we walked through the camp, there were areas where the snow was literally up to my knees. Although that may not seem foreign to my friends who ski often, I have not experienced that much snow in well over a decade and a half. It was a winter wonderland where we went tubin’ and sledding down hills. Even just walking through the still, crisp air hearing silence in a rare form, I was reminded of the awesomeness of God’s creation.

These are some random friends from the retreat. They are participating in an activity that I helped put together.... like an Amazing Race

I even saw snowflakes in a new way. Perhaps I just have never really investigated snowflakes. For about 15 minutes the beauty of the unique shapes, variation and perfection of the snowflakes mesmerized me. The snow was dry and powdery, unlike other snow that I had experienced before, and it was truly magnificent to think that God has caused each snowflake (and there was an abundance of them) to be formed. There is nothing that stands outside of his sovereignty.

The sessions that were taught were insightful as I was challenged on the concept of brokenness. Surely, that is something that was not taught in the church where I was raised, but even in recent times there hasn’t been a call to be broken before the Lord. I think it’s because of the fear of brokenness. At least it is for me; a fear of pain, suffering, trouble, frustration and separation from God. At times I think to myself, “I’ve had enough of being alone, lonely, and frustrated without God having to ‘break’ me even more.” God is opening my eyes to the fact that what I fear is precisely the point of brokenness. As I truly depend on God He will carry me through each of these tough times as I continually give up my efforts to do everything and even anything outside of his strength. I am thankful for this revelation to my heart as I learn more about Him.

I still do not have a definitive answer in regards to where I will be placed for the Church Plant that God would have me to pastor. I am praying fervently for wisdom for myself as well as for the leaders under whose authority I serve. Please pray with me.

My spirits are lifted, I am encouraged and I thank God for each chance I have to connect with other saints of God – new and past friends. Pray that I can continue to draw yet closer.